Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Today I celebrate...the end of Today...

God, this one is hard...

This is one of those character building days you bring me...
I know it is to make me more like you, and I know, as with all of the mountains that have come my way...I will be thankful for this day.......one day....
For now...You know this all ready, but I feel like crap.
Today, I can only hope to release this back to you, through my words and my tears...I need you.

It really has been a culmination I guess....a difficult weekend, some stinging remarks, some robbing of joys, the embarrassment of being at a check out, while my debit was in my son's wallet, the tears of a dissapointed little girl, Some newly discovered, yet very old, very painful truths, a little boy coming home sick, forgetting to pick up another little girl, being hit by a young driver who was more concerned about his friends than watching, not being able to just curl up and cry and sleep after all of that...having to brave the world again, only to have some creepy guy hand me his business card...Do I look like I buy video games?

God, I don't understand today, and I don't understand why it was all in one day...I have the rest of the week to still get through...
I am not sure of a lot of things at this very moment...but I will take solace in what I do know:

I have proven you always faithful...
I have felt you heal me in my body and my heart repeatedly....
I know you never change....
I know you are coming through, even as I grieve this day...
I know I will feel better...
I know you have given me a wonderful friend that cares enough to call, and check on me...
I know that you understand what I can't right now....
I know I can trust you with all of this...
I know I will smile again...
I know your mercies are new every morning....and it will soon be morning...
I know you give me strength that I do not have...
I know, as my friend Holly has declared...IT WILL ONLY GET BETTER!
For, now.....help me.

11 comments:

Roxanne said...

Jen, thank you for your honesty. Today is a new day and yes, His mercies are new every morning. I am so thankful for that. You are wise to admit your feelings and have the wisdom to rely on truth. His promises keep me going when all around can seem like chaos.

Williams Family Blog said...

Jen,

Here is a little song from my camp days.....
"Day is DONE, gone the sun. From the lakes, from the hills from the skies. All is well, safely rest. Night is here."

Since it is now AM, I hope you had a peaceful night and I know
the rest of your week is going to be a breeze compared to Monday.

Thanks for being so transparent....

Love yah,

Karen

Holly said...

My dear friend Jenny!
What a horrible day you had...thank God it is OVER! Praying much for you.
Love you.

Amy said...

Jen,
I have thought and prayed for you all morning.
I had tons of errands to run..I was praying for you in Zellers, at M&M meats, at the second hand store, driving, getting gas...My prayers are with you.
Thank goodness his mercies are new every morning.

Blessings to you today and the rest of the week.
Amy

Jen said...

Amy

Thank you...you are very sweet.
Today is much better...I even got to take a walk by the Bay with Holly...still some stuff to process...but I will get there.

Thank you all for your support...I know this wasn't an "uplifting blog" but I needed to get this out, and I knew it would help me cry it out...so I guess this one was for me.
You are all wonderful!

Shari said...

Sorry Jen

In the midst of everything I missed reading your blog last night.

I bless your honesty and pray for your blessing. I know that God will keep you safe in His arms. May the winds of refreshing sweep over you and your household. The bay is a good place to go and Holly is a wonderful friend to join you.

On a side note - you could improve your time by the bay with a coffee in hand!! Sorry just couldn't resist adding that little note!

Love you
Shari

Jen said...

Shari

If I had taken even a SIP of coffee, I would have been reverted back to yesterday...can't stand the taste...even a little...BLECKKKY!

Rhonda said...

Sorry you had such a crappy day yesterday!!

Anonymous said...

Hey Jen sorry to here about your rough day. And I read Rhonda's also. We read your remarks on Rhonda's blog and Mark & Mark say AMEN, you two are blessed :-)

Cheryl said...

Jen,
I am with you my friend, a few days late but there.
Interestingly enough, I had a discouraging and disappointing day on Monday, and really had to choose to press through the negative thoughts that come and bombard at these times.

I bless your perseverance and faith in the midst of unanswered questions.
These are the days that His grace and the prayers of others carry us.

Tamatha said...

Wow...you had a hell of a week that day! I sure have a lot of reading to do to catch up on ppl's blogs.